my email to a head pujari

[Paramananda das]

dear ........... Prabhu

Please accept my humble obaisences

All glories to Srila Prabhupada

I like to explain you my thoughts about bringing Giriraja to ISKCON ...... .I am not really inclined anymore.I am a senior devotee , never even asked to give Srimad Bhagavatam class, or lead kirtana there.

There is some other internal things, in relation to my Giriraja worship also,I am writting an article about maybe I will share it with you.I have been pushed down by MANY ENVIOUS AND NEOPHYTE DEVOTEES FOR TO LONG , I AM BY FAR SUPERIOR TO THEM IN MY KC.Their motivations are often of mixed nature, mine are not.There is some persons that do not even chant 16 rounds and they are given more facility than I am.I am not even dependent on ISKCON Potomac for my spiritual life, I can go on practicing for 1000 of years and not need

to go , but I still go because it is Prabhupadas temple and I have some friends there. I was invited to speak about Lord Balarama by Param Dhama Prabhu on His apperance day, that was nice they gave me an opportunity to glorify Lord Baladeva.I am not complaining, just pointing this out to you.I gave you one Giriraja Sila, and you my dear friend was so foolish to give it away, because you do not understand the glories of Giriraja.What I send you some years back about Govardhana is but a small fraction of Girirajas glory, but I am never given an opportunity to glorifie Giriraja.So when younger devotees wants to sit on my head, and not observe proper vaisnava etiqutte it is sad.I think you know what kind of devotee I am.I have a Yugal Kisora Govardhana Sila, that is superior to all Govardhana Silas worship in all of America .But I will never be given a change to explain His glories because everyone thinks they know it all and do not need to hear .Or they will take Divya jnana and pass it on as their own.

I feel very sad for the lack of vaisnava etiquette .But in some places I have gone and been properly respected and their I have explained about Yugal Kisora Govardhan Sila.The size of Giriraja is irrelevant but some Govardhana Silas are special among all others, it is in sastra.

I am not bringing Giriraja anymore for abhisekam on Govardhana puja, one reason is I will not let anyone touch any of my Govardhana Silas anymore, who do not chant 64 rounds,Lord Caitanya ordered this amount as minimum, and Raghunath das Goswami was given Govardhana Sila by Lord Caitanya, and worshipped Him properly.Unless one is chanting 64 rounds and has some deeper understanding of Giriraja one will not get the real result.It is a confidential subject matter.But so many devotees have Giriraja , they are all Krsna and Hari dasa Varya, if you are advanced you can understand this if not , it may not happen in this life.

The worship of Giriraja is really a worship in raga marg,I have worshipped Giriraja for 24 years and now I am start understanding really deeply about Giriraja and His significance.You are all lucky at least to see Giriraja once a year.He should be really worshipped every day, but most do not understand why.It is very sad.Radharani has blessed me somehow.

I pray everything is blessed for your bhajan

your servant

Payonidhi das